From One Mom to Another

I know we haven't met, but as I sit here, snuggling my son and his faithful dog, I think about you and your grown son. There are so many things I would like to think I know about you based on the kid you released into the world. I imagine a mom who loved to have a houseful of kids, because it meant that they were safe, under your roof. I know that your family laughs a lot and takes pleasure in just being together. I know that you sat around the dinner table as a family. Later, there were brownies for dessert, for the belly that never seemed to stay full.

The other night when we sat down to dinner, my kids thought he should say grace. And he did with the same eagerness and thankfulness I see in my own children. As the heads were bowed, my husband and I exchanged a glance, both thinking of how we encourage our kids to pray something sincere and new each night. His manners remind me that even though I feel impatient with the constant reminders to my kids, it still is leaving an impression.

Every week he comes with a bagful of laundry. I may feed him, but he always takes care of his own chores. I've watched him sort and wash his clothes in awe, remembering the fight the other night for the kids to put away theirs.  As he carefully puts them back in his tote, folded and ready to go again for the week, I think, someday my children will do that, too.

I'll never forget how excited he was one day in class to find out that I had three young kids. I've never seen a kid, much less an almost grown man, ask so earnestly to babysit. It always warms my heart when they ask for him, even more, to see all of them piled on my couch watching a movie. When my little guy is tormenting his sisters, your son always tells mine that he needs to take care of his sisters, making him apologize. Because family is important. I grin, as he reminds the girls of the same thing, too. As I watch him talk and listen to my husband about four wheeling and fixing things, I see a kid whose parents took the time not just to show him how to live, but also teach him how to live. Your love of family shines through, deeply instilled in a kid who cherishes not only his, but also other's. 

I know it was hard to see him move away and go to college. But when he moved, you shared your heart with many people. You reminded me that the time I have to snuggle my kids while they are small is important. All of those repeated reminders to clean up after themself or be kind to each other are not in vain. One day, my kids, too will be spreading their wings to fly. Always, their roots will guide them to a place to call home, even when home is far away.

Most importantly, I see how much he loves his mom.  The honor and respect he shows for the people that nurture him is endearing and a true testament of the environment he was raised in. As we finish Spring term, I know new changes and challenges come as he, again, sets off to new places. My kids will ask for him, acknowledging the empty spot on the couch, place at the table and extra dessert left after he’s gone. The lessons they learned and the time spent will hold his place in our family.

We know our kids are doing well through their grades, through their awards and through recognition in other aspects. But sometimes, the unremarkable is just as important as the remarkable. When they are young, people easily compliment you on their behavior, their manners and how they treat each other. After eighteen, the rest of the things you worked so repetitively to instill goes unspoken, but is often appreciated.

Some days the job as mom seems endless, but when I see your son with my kids, I realize just how fast it will go. It reminds me to take the extra time and do things right, even though it seems tedious or slow. All of the effort you put into shaping his life shows through the relationship he builds with others while out on his own. Thank you so much for sharing your kid, your life and your love, making an impression through the grown son we had on loan.