Space Invaders

DISCLAIMER: If you think you are annoying, don’t read this post. The perspective expressed is from the writer, not presented as fact. My counselor says this is normal. She offers temperament training that can further explain this on terms that are friendlier and more conducive to constructive communication of stated views. Let me know if you would like a referral.

Annoying people love me. It doesn’t matter what I do. Really. They LOVE me. I never knew it was possible to have your space invaded so many ways. Personal space, cyberspace, they will find you. It’s one of these things that you just can’t escape sometimes. It’s not really that you want to upset them or burst their bubble, but really, sometimes you’d just like to politely be left out. Then there are other times when you wish you could beg for an invitation but are too reserved to butt your way in.

I am the first to be accused of being the person that you don’t see for years or months at a time that you see again and pick up where you left off. I have no problem with that. I have many friends that I have had for years that I love dearly even though I don’t communicate with them more frequently. Facebook has been fabulous for keeping caught up with everyone. I love it and I do treasure my friends.

But then, there are the space invaders. It doesn’t matter how much space and time you try to put between you, they want to be closer. Space is a healthy thing. I like it very much, almost to a fault. I would wear a space suit out in public if I had one. I worked for a doctor once that was a leaner. It took me a long time to get used to it. It was kind of creepy in the beginning because if he would converse with you with only a couple of inches between your faces. I never quite understood it. It wouldn’t have been so bad, but he was rather tall. He’d bend over and invade your space like patio umbrella that’s too short.

I understand that there are many types of people in this world and I am okay with that. I really enjoy people watching. Sometimes, though, I feel like my world is a little too similar to a fishbowl. I always get the ones that want to press their face up against the surface with their nose making steam on the glass. My kids do that on the patio door and leave smudges all the time. It drives me crazy. Cyberspace seems to have created a false intimacy to the space invaders giving them access to a world that is usually locked behind a brief smile and a casual hello.

You know the ones. When you are standing in a line to get into a concert, they are the stranger that bumps and nudges you or accidently touches your butt because they have no concept of personal space. They don’t apologize for it, either. Even though the line isn’t moving, they are eager to maintain a forward motion.  Or they are the fox hunters: the ones that work overtime to corner you for a hug and then hold on too long. If you choose a different route, they will jump hurdles to tackle you for the contact. If you are like me, you always like to think that you would hug them, but most of the time you don’t. You don’t want to invade their bubble or are too busy maintaining your own bubble. 

There are some people whose constant invasions don’t bother me one bit. I thank God all of the time that I have a husband that LOVES the space invaders and me! When people hug him, he doesn’t get the hamster squeezed too tight look, he just melts into the embrace. In a crowd, he actively searches for people he knows. I like to be hidden. Just not in the folds of some stranger’s sweater or backside.  People’s lack of boundaries doesn’t seem to bother him, but they drive me crazy. I wanna slap a striped shirt on them and ask “Where’s Waldo”?

I always feel bad, because I display my space loving behavior even in my sleep! My husband’s mom made such a great snuggler. He loves to cuddle. I cuddle as long as I can, but then, I move away and stretch out, taking up as much of the king sized bed as I can. I love the cold spots! The kids always sneak into the bed on his side of the bed. That usually pushes the dog to my side of the bed, where he gets inadvertently kicked as I assume the star shaped sleeping position.

This week, I think I would rather be a space invader. I’ve been cooped up a little bit too long, reading historical novels to pass my time between kids, walks and cleaning. I’d gladly take one of those hugs or go have coffee just to listen to some idle chatter between friends. Maybe have someone to go take a walk with or watch a girly movie.  Instead, I think I’ll finish my blog and resume reading my book.